Start preparing your party plans, for in no less than four months it is the anniversary of Turkmenistan’s late President-for-Life Saparmurat Niyazov’s first term in office. President Niyazov, a modest celebrity and inspiration to us here at ReverseColonoscopy, is well known for humble quotes such as “I watched young dogs when I was young. They were given bones to gnaw to strengthen their teeth. Those of you whose teeth have fallen out did not chew on bones”. His wisdom was unparalleled.

To exemplify his people’s, and indeed our love for him here is a final quote:

“I’m personally against seeing my pictures and statues in the streets… But it’s what the people want”. Rest in RIP glorious leader. May your reign extend into the afterlife.

-KD

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