Is Racism Real?

The world is full of controversial topics, and arguably chief amongst them is race and racism despite the concept of race having no real bearing in science. To clarify about such a controversial topic, we here at ReverseColonoscopy intend to offend as many people as possible.

So, is racism even real? To answer this question, we must first find the definition of “racism”. The dictionary definitions of it are “a contest of speed, as in running, riding, driving, or sailing” and “to engage in a contest of speed; run a race”. So well, I think. I think it is real, because like. People run a lot. Erm. I might need to do some more analysis guys. I blame the ReverseColonoscopy’s research department. 

-KD

It’s about to get quizzical

Firstly as a respected unrespected editor for this blog I would like to apologise for the terrible, appalling, dreadful, dire, ghastly pun in the title.

In a seemingly “democratic” society, we are subjected to this terrible Grammer and despite campaigning for unequal vocabulary, my efforts have been unsuccessful. The word “Quizzical” I would like to remind readers is a myth, a lie, a representation of where this country is heading.

Are we supporting British Values? Or are we fuelling a communist society?

-HB

P.s – We are partaking in a quiz this evening

Late Edit- We totally won

What your bread choice says about you

We’ve all been there, What sandwich do you want? what sauce? Salad? Drink? Being bombarded by inane questions that make little difference to your overall life and wellbeing. I myself have had extremely bad experiences in the so called ‘Subway’ which has lead to me suffering regular mental breakdowns and a multitude of severe flashbacks.

To protest this I have recently been doing the ‘indie’ thing and using local sandwich shops such as ‘Top Shop’ for a number of years. The one question posed “Soft White or Hard Brown??

Unfortunately in this time of economic instability and uncertainty about jobs along with immigration and all that jazz, its impossible to comprehend such a question in such little time and therefore I shall leave it up to your interpretation

“Soft white or Hard Brown”

-HB

Warning: Graphic Imagery Unsuitable For Children

One of ReverseColonoscopy’s journalists in happenstance came upon a gruesome image etched onto the pavement, showing what must have been a horrific accident mere minutes beforehand. It seems that a pastry, perhaps a chicken and stuffing pastry at that, had slipped from someone’s grasp and ended up chalked onto the floor in a graphic facsimile. While it seemed to have been eaten regardless, someone, somewhere, must have had a day ruined beyond belief. We can only pray, be it for or against the wishes of the pugs, for the lost soul that day.

RIP in peace

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RIP

-KD (the one that has legible grammar)

Aloe Vera

If today was yesterday and Thursday was Monday a month from then would be Wednesday, Yes you guessed it, Friday is upon us

Today we at Reverse Colonoscopy thought would be the perfect time to talk about the reasonably unknown trend sweeping a small Asda in the rural-ish town of Beverley.

Aloe Vera Drinks?

Due to our extremely low budget and passion for drinking ‘soap’ like drinks, We thought we should investigate.

The initial aroma of the substance, a combination of bleach and Lime is the first thing that hits you. However in search of the truth we ditched our natural instincts to dispose of the “Aloe Vera” humanely and carefully poured small glasses for each member of the group.

** This is also a good time to point out that none of our experiments should be tried at home unless the necessary safety equipment is used **

Up until now the almost fluorescent green bottle had hidden the yellow colour of the liquid along with numerous amounts of what can only be described as “Floating Matter”. Unusually the taste was almost distinguishable from the smell, However the thing t
hat shocked us more was how addictive the substance was even with its quite major flaws.

Joe Gillyon a member of our experiment had this to say on the whole experience

“When life gives you lemons, Make Aloe Vera”Aloe Vera

This inspirational quote I think is a metaphor which can be related to all aspects of life as we journey through an endless variety of paths (Probably controlled by the government). As a final point we would like to thank the EPA for not letting Coca
Cola take over the world and replace this wonder from the back of all Asda stores.

-HB